How To Not Lose Yourself A Relationship


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Question: How Can I Stop Losing Myself In A Relationship?

EYES OF THE MYSTIC – PORTLAND, OREGON *pen names for privacy

I recently am beginning to understand that I have a deep rooted pattern in WORSHIPING the male. When it comes to loveship, I no longer am my own everything. It is as if I take a step back from knowing the truth of who I am. I judge myself in so many different ways and can lose my sense of self.

I notice that I put my partner’s energy as the first energy within my world. It’s as if I am living my life with them in my constant flow, within the mind. Without the male even knowing, I play it cool, yet inside of me it’s another story.

I would like guidance from my guides to help me connect the dots as a recent traumatic heartbreak experience has brought me closer to re-understanding that I am a worshiper of the male.

I want to change and I am now practicing when something heartbreaking occurs from my lover, I disconnect, then I come home to myself. I am important as my main source. I redefine my core values, my voice, my needs and wants. It just happens, its as if I finally have come out of hiding.

I ask for support on how to completely worship myself. I do in fact want to reprogram and allow a new form of relationship to come into my life without the patterns of losing myself.

I dream to be completely worshiped and loved by my own divine lover. I feel like I have the worshiping down for the male outside of myself, so now I want to come in and worship all that I am.

I want to have a future partnership of two lovers worshiping their own self and then each other. Thank you, I am ready to move forward within self worship!

BRENNA AND GUIDES:  Beautiful One, you sound like you are on the right track. Very good question, how do you worship yourself?

In ancient times your human energy systems were programmed not to love yourselves. This was the influence of beings that wanted to create control on this planet for themselves, it never did work out for them. Many humans today are waking up out of the illusion and taking back their own self empowerment and authority.

The young beings as yourself, that are here now on this planet, see right through the illusion. You are opening your Eyes of the Mystic. You see that you really can worship and be madly in love with yourself. Your influence is helping the older generations awaken and remember who they are too.

As the Wheel of Karma turns; you might feel a nagging pull of your outdated imprints of the past, warning you against such egoic behavior as worshiping yourself.

The old teachings of the past may whisper to you; “If you do not have a male partner and you are alone there is something wrong with you…you have no worth.” Ancient warnings waft up from the depths…."women who are independent and self-sufficient are judged and persecuted as being witches, beware and hide your power”. 

A woman’s worth and survival was dependent on her man. If she would ever dare to leave her man, she most likely would be expelled from the village and put out to starve and perish. Countless tortures and crimes were committed on women that did not obey their man.

Women were closely monitored never to gain their power. Self judgement, shame and guilt were created to control, they are a powerful poison to take down a woman. Guilt, shame and judgement are thieves of light and life, draining the woman of her powers.

There is an empty void that has been created inside of you, this is an imprint that has been passed down to you to by your ancestors. This void was created so you would hunger for a male partner outside of you, this was created by your lineage to keep you safe. It was designed to create a primal yearning, so you would do anything to keep him close to you, to feed your empty chamber of fear. 

We might offer a suggestion for your evolution into freedom. If you could begin to fill this void with your own love. Bit by bit, filling yourself up with kindness, encouragement, thoughtfulness and attention. Gifting, giving, nurturing yourself….the void would be filled and become fertile terrain. You will then begin your ascent into living a life as a fully self empowered woman. 

Once you have filled this void with your own love, this will be a completion of Karma. This new evolved state of consciousness will move through all of your family roots, to the past and to the future generations.

Your generation is the new human coming back to do things right. You have learned from past lifetimes what not to do. You know it is time to love and worship yourselves.

Be aware….the past voices of your inherited karma will sing the old songs of days gone by, when the feminine energy was oppressed on this planet. You can send your love to the old ways…..thanking them for the lessons…..and begin to create the new beautiful empowered woman with a bright destiny ahead.

You are free! You can be your own foundation, balanced in the masculine and feminine energies, to be your own true lover. A life of freedom, self governed, self-ruling and sovereign. You will be a magnet, attracting others who are also self empowered. Creating loving, balanced relationships that are not built from need, greed, and bargains.

Brenna recommends the audio meditation journeys and videos listed on this page for guidance and support.

We are always here to assist you in this enlightening journey,

Love, Your Guides and Brenna




THE MAGICAL ESSENCE OF YOU: This video is about alchemy. Create your dream life with your own personal essence. You have the power to make magic happen in your life!

THE GODDESS OF LOVE REVEALED: Brenna Iset is a shamanic hypnotist. Follow her meditation journey into your mind to heal, re-pattern and create the life of your dreams.

THE FOUNTAIN OF YOUTH: You can learn to turn on your own body's wellspring of vital energy at your command. After years of studying with many Buddhist Monks, Swamis, Gurus and Guides, I have created this technique to activate the Fountain of Youth within. Enjoy!

Brenna Iset